


Arson Is A Felony

by Grace_lynn



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Arson, Crack, Fire, Hanamaki Takahiro is a Little Shit, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Iwaizumi Hajime Is So Done, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Fluff, M/M, Mentioned Ushijima Wakatoshi, Oikawa Tooru Needs a Hug, Oikawa loves true crime, Protective Iwaizumi Hajime, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, You Should Have Come to Shiratorizawa, please dont commit arson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:54:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29974911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grace_lynn/pseuds/Grace_lynn
Summary: Iwaizumi was not expecting this to happen, he wasn't expecting to be able to say he committed a felony and may or may not have gotten away with it. It was definitely a story to tell the kids.Of course with Oikawa, he should have expected something like this to happen at one point.___There's this playlist on youtube that I found and I got inspired.listen to it while you read this it will set the mood, I promise.
Relationships: Hanamaki Takahiro/Matsukawa Issei, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	Arson Is A Felony

**Author's Note:**

> Listen to this. It's the main inspiration for this. Start it from the beginning though.   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdWBovGPf4c&t=3112s
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!

Iwaizumi would do a lot for Oikawa, But this was testing the limits. 

It was a late summer Saturday night.

Iwaizumi was getting ready to binge-watch the Godzilla series (again) when it happened. 

Normally Oikawa would be here too, probably fighting over what movie they should watch and what snacks were absolutely mandatory for a movie night. But he wasn't here for a reason that wasn't confirmed. It was suspicious behavior considering Oikawa was the one who insisted on spending the nights and staying up till the sun rises watching the new Tv series or a movie. Iwaizumi never actually minded even when he pretended it bothered him and actually enjoyed these nights where he could relax with the one person he was the most comfortable with. 

It was about midnight when he got a text. It was from Oikawa asking for random items, like if he had matches and gasoline. 

💕✨Tooru Shittykawa💕✨

Iwa-chan! Quick question, do you have matches? I kinda need them. Gasoline might be nice too

Iwaizumi   
Wtf.. why would you need matches and gasoline??

💕✨Tooru Shittykawa💕✨  
✨i l l e g a l a c t i v i t i e s ✨

Iwaizumi   
Oml are you committing arson??? 

Iwaizumi   
Oikawa answer me

Iwaizumi  
???? 

Iwaizumi was worried, to say the least, not for Oikawa, but for the people around him and whatever he was planning on burning to the ground. Oikawa has said some off the wall shit before, has done some things that are questionable. He wasn’t afraid to ask intrusive questions that would lead too complicated and sometimes ill-moraled ways of finding those answers but committing arson? That was new. 

What was he even planning on burning? Hopefully, it wasn't something that would get him into actual trouble, hopefully, it's not a person..

A loud honk from a car outside drew him from his phone, a very familiar honk. It was “hurry your ass up” and it rang loudly when everything was silent. He looked out his window, moving the curtains to find the sleek black car that was Tooru Oikawa’s. He was waving out the window and was signaling him to come outside. 

Iwaizumi grabbed a jacket and grabbed the first pair of jeans he could find, throwing them on quickly and skipping stairs on the way down, throwing on his shoes and walking out the door. He felt the summer night breeze on his face. It was warm considering it was half past midnight but not as warm as his house was. 

“Shittykawa what the fuck is going on?” Iwaizumi walked over to the car watching Oikawa smile grow in a mischievous way. He's seen it before, It was going to be a long night. 

“Get in the car bitch! We have places to be and be soon!” 

“You didn't answer my question” 

“All will be explain on the way, now hurry up Iwa-chan” 

“This better be good” Iwaizumi grumbled as he opened the passenger door and got into the seat. He looked into the rearview mirror and saw very very familiar pink-tinted blonde hair and dark brown spikey hair in the back seat. 

Hanamaki gave a sly grin and Matsukawa lifted his arm and waved. 

“Why are they here?” he pointed his thumb to the other two-third years.

“Well Mattsun has matches and Makki’s just here for the ride” 

“And that explains literally nothing, what the hell are you doing with matches Oikawa” 

“Well there this..Farm and I need it gone, to prove a point. So I thought what the best way to get rid of a big structure and I remember that it's made out of wood and shit, so arson. But I don't have matches or anything fire-y at my house-” 

“For good reason” Iwaizumi interrupted him. The man was a senior, a third year in high school and was barely allowed to have candles because he would find a way to burn himself or set the house on fire. Of course there were no matches in any Tooru accessible areas. You could always count on Tooru to misbehave and cause trouble. 

“Yeah, well, it's either arson or I find a goddamn wrecking ball, But that makes too much noise and I'm trying to go to nationals not jail.” 

“I mean isn't arson like a felony or something?” Mattsun sounded from the back seat, he looked very entertained by the scene in front of him. Cheeky little shit. 

“Well actually Arson can be considered a misdemeanor, although it's always considered a felony in the eyes of the law. They consider the severity and risk factor when looking at the case though.” Oikawa smugly smirked into the mirror looking back at Mattsun and then Iwaizumi, he looked so proud of himself. 

“So you did your research?” Makki tilted his head to the side, almost impressed with the knowledge he was spitting. 

“Of course, I've known this for years, it comes in handy for things like this. It's a farm half a mile from the main house, nothing important is in it as far as I know. So there is barely any risk factor and as for severity.. Well we will be gone before they knew it was us.”

“Ok back to the important shit. Whose farm are we burning and why are we burning down a fucking farm at almost 1 am?!” 

“Iwa-chan no need to yell, I'll tell you”

“It's Ushijima’s farm,” Makki said and grabbed the two packs of matches from Mattsuns hands. 

“Oikawa wants to burn the farm to send a message to stop saying ‘You Should Have Gone To Shiratorizawa” Mattsun mimics Ushijima's monotone voice and the two in the back burst out laughing. Iwaizumi was still processing the information that he was given. They are going at 1 am to burn down a farm. Not just any farm but Ushijima’s farm because..Oikawa was tired of hearing him say he should have gone to a different school..this was madness. 

“Nooo guys you don't get it” Oikawa whined and took a sharp left turn. 

“Oh yeah sure cause there is a valid reason to commit a felony and burn down a poor dude's farm” Iwaizumi rolled his eyes and let the sarcasm drip into his words. 

“Do not side with him! Iwa-chan you know how much I hate him and he's taken it too far!!” Oikawa all but screeched and took a right turn this time. Did the man even know where he was going? 

“He was in my dreams Iwa-chan. My dreams.” Oikawa shuttered at the memory and continued  
“he followed me and wouldn't leave me be and just kept telling me ‘You Should Have Gone To Shiratorizawa’ with his stupid overalls and his stupid voice and i can't live like this!” 

Iwaizumi wanted to laugh, under different circumstances he probably would have, it was hilarious the lengths his boyfriend would go to. He had a dream, something that wasn't even real and did not happen. And because of a simple dream that could be considered a nightmare for Oikawa, he wanted to commit arson. 

And of course he would drag his friends down the rabbit hole with him. 

“It was a dream, a dream babe.” 

“I know he had something to do with it! Don't even try to convince me otherwise. I don't care if you don't believe me, This will give me peace of mind. They won't even know it was me, or us..” 

“You have one hell of ego if you think that we're gonna get away with this. You're sending us straight to jail with this suicide mission.” he turned his body to face the two in the back “are you guys really willing to go to jail for the night for this man?” 

“I’ll just blame everything on Oikawa and call my dad” hanamakki said looking at the ‘dirt’ under his nails.

“It’ll be a fun story to tell the kouhai, and plus if this is what the captain wants why not?” Mattsun shrugged. 

Iwaizumi just stared in disbelief at them. Were they serious? Was this just another Saturday night with the boyz for them? 

“I know about my ego, i don't know why it's such a big deal Iwa-chan, it's not hurting anyone” 

“You want to commit arson, which is illegal by the way and burn Ushijima’s farm to the ground..I'm pretty sure that's hurting people Tooru!” 

“With no one inside! No one getting harmed in any way!” 

Oikawa was not giving in, nor seeing anything rational. He probably had this planned out to the second, the best way to burn down this farm and a getaway plan that was fool proof. This was The Oikawa Tooru we were talking about, he was one of the smartest people Iwaizumi knew but the fact he was using this intelligence to commit a felony was unbelievable. He was so smart but with that he was stubborn and determined. If he put actual thought about this and was emotional about it, there was no way anyone was getting him to see reason or get him to back down. And if Iwaizumi couldn't stop him then no one could. 

He looked at the backside again and then his boyfriend. Maybe Makki and Mattsun had the right idea. Just be here for the ride, he was already in the car and there was no backing out now Iwaizumi thought. Oikawa’s got him wrapped around his finger, He can't just let Oikawa get into trouble by himself. 

“Ok, ok! Fine! But nobody needs to know about this. We don't need the FBI or some shit knocking at the door asking if we're committing Arson.” 

“Thank you Iwa-chan!” 

“Yes sir!” 

“Whatever you say” 

It wasn't long before they ended on the opposite end of a large field. Oikawa shut the car off and was biting his lip to try and hide the wide smile that twisted his features, he looked like a kid who was promised whatever he wanted in the candy shop. He was almost vibrating in the driver's seat. 

“Ok so that's the farm, the plans simple” Oikawa started but with all of Aobojo Sai’s Third Years, it was not about to be as easy. 

“Don't get caught” Iwaizumi injected 

“Set a farm on fire” Makki also said 

“How hard can it be?” Mattsun shrugged looking out the window to the building across the way. 

“Will you guys let me finish!” 

“...isn't that Iwaizumi's job to help you finis-“ 

“Makki if you finish that sentence I swear to god I’ll throw your ass in the fire, don't make me get violent” Iwaizumi glared at the boy in the back and he shrugged innocently. 

“Anyways. Everyone by this time on Saturdays should be sleeping at the main houses which is definitely enough away that they shouldn’t be alarmed immediately. It gives us about 30 minutes to an hour to start the fire and leave.” 

“One it’s kinda creepy you know all this. Two why would it take us an hour, I thought we were just gonna set it on fire and leave” 

“But what’s the fun in that Iwa-Chan?” 

“Are we just gonna ignore the fact that he has their sleep schedule by the day memorized?” 

“Hush now Mattsun it’s not important how I know. It’s the fact that I know it. And it helps us. Now I do believe we have a fire to set” 

Everyone looks at one another like they were doubting whether they were actually about to set a farm on fire. It was crazy how this night was going. But when Oikawa driver door shut and was already headed towards the farm house Iwaizumi was the first to follow, getting out and jogging to catch up to the man who had taken off towards the barn. 

Makki and Mattsun followed reluctantly shoving each other with their shoulders as they ran to catch up. 

“Why did we park so far away from the barn?” 

“Well you see they could track the tire tracks and match them to my car since I technically do have a motive to set this barn on fire. So if we leave the car and its tire tracked on a well-known trail it won’t look suspicious since there are at least 18 different other tracks there.” The brunette stated matter of factly. He was such a know it all, about the weird things. 

“How many crown shows has he watched?” 

“Criminal minds, BuzzFeed unsolved, law in order specifically special victims unit. Those American horror stories are his favorite” Iwaizumi listed off the ones that came to mind. Oikawa had been watching most of those since middle school and became slightly obsessed with true crime. There were definitely more than Oikawa has seen and probably took notes on but those were his personal favorites out of the bunch. 

As soon as they got closer to the barn they slowed down to a jog until they were standing in front of Ushijima’s family barn. The main house that was half a mile away was pitch black, no lights were on and they were completely unsuspecting. Was he really about to let Oikawa burn this man's farm down? 

It was illegal. For sure it was something his mom would be disappointed at him for. But then he remembers the time he’s had to hold Oikawa back from fighting and causing a scene, the times he’s had to defend Oikawa's name and his choices. He was proud of his partner and he supported most of his decisions. And having another talk shit about them and bring him down was not something he allowed. 

Oikawa was his lifetime partner. They had been together since childhood. Every childhood memory he has involved Tooru in some way and he couldn’t envision a future without him in it. He would be a wreck without him even if he pretended he wouldn’t, and hid how in love he was. If this was what he wanted to do on a Saturday night at 1 am. Iwaizumi might as well join him. And if Iwaizumi has his own reasons for wanting to get back at the captain of Shiratorizawa then so be it. 

“Ok! Makki, the matches!” The chocolate brunette held out his hand and Hanamaki rolled his eyes as he grabbed the matches from his pocket and placed them in his hand. 

It was quiet, it was nearing 1:30 am and the chill in the air was settling. The four of them stood in front of a massive barn house. It was in fact made of mostly freshly painted wood and Oikawa took a peek inside, it was full of the normal stuff you would find in a farm. Haystacks in the corner tools and such on the walls and barrels in the far corner. 

Tooru was a curious person by nature. He was always adventurous and poked into people's personal affairs not to be rude but because he was curious. He wanted to know how they functioned, their reactions, their perspective on things..it helped him build his team to be what they were today. It gave him an understanding of them as individuals. And sometimes he exploited his knowledge but it was for the greater good. Like right now. 

The barrels in the corner had labels on them and there was a smaller barrel than the rest. It read “flammable!” In rushed handwriting. Now if Tooru wasn’t a curious little shit he never would have seen the oil in the barrel. It makes his job ten times easier. 

He signaled for Iwaizumi and the other to follow suit. 

“Look! It’s an oil barrel, we should tip it over and lite a couple of matches” 

Makki shrugged and nodded as he walked over to the barrel, Iwaizumi helped as they gently, not to make too much noise, tipped the barrel and let the context spill out. Oikawa had jumped back so it wouldn’t ruin his shoes. But he claimed it was because he didn’t want “evidence” on them when they all knew he just didn’t want to have oil stains on them. 

Mattsun came out of the darkness and found a bucket and was picking up oil and throwing it on the walls. They laughed as they took turns throwing oil on whatever they could. They may have made more of a mess then they meant to and Oikawa’s shoes did not in fact make it unstained but he was having the time of his life. 

Once they were satisfied and enough oil was everywhere they made a small trail that way they would have to be inside to lit the match. 

“Oikawa you may do the honors” Makki lit the first match and Tooru took it and quickly threw it inside the small gap of the barn door. At first, it seemed like nothing happened, but a crackling and popping made it obvious that the fire had started inside. 

The other three lit their own matches and laughed as they threw them in different areas, Iwaizumi on the heavily oil-coated wall that sparked a big flame as it touched the oil. Makki and Mattsun fought to see who could throw it farther and lighted the back part of the barn ablaze. 

As they watched the flames grow and up the barn had gone in slow flames. The heat from the flames became more apparent, they took a couple steps back and Tooru watched the smoke come out of the roof. He smiled as he felt the heat and the yellow-orange hues glow and danced on his skin. In a dangerous way, he was beautiful. Iwaizumi stepped behind him and wrapped his arms around him. 

“You know, you're crazy right?”

“You love it” 

“I love you”

“Same difference” Oikawa giggled and swayed them back and forth like they were dancing. He turned in Hajime’s arms to give him a kiss. With the adrenaline rushing in their blood from the realization of what they had done. They kissed passionately.

Oikawa pressed all his emotions, love, excitement, and trust into the kiss, and Iwaizumi responded with just as much love and trust, his loyalty to the man was admirable and it showed how far he was willing to go for his lover. When they broke off gasping from the air they laughed. 

They had begun to sway and dance in the flames glow and basking in the warmth it provided, Makki and Mattsun had joined the pair and they waltzed in the dirt. Twirling around and falling into a rhythm that only they knew. It was like they had the world in their hands.

Who knew committing a felony would be so intimate and romantic. No wonder Harley Quinn was in love with the Joker. This feeling was unmatched but felt a lot like winning did. Winning a hard volleyball tournament, winning he’s childhood friends love and affection after pinning for so long, winning and the adrenaline that came with it was addictive. 

“I love you too, you know” Tooru whispered to Hajime. 

“I know.”

“I wouldn’t ask anyone else to do this with me. I know the risk but I’m glad you're here.” 

“Who else would go with your insane plans to commit a felony at midnight” Hajime chuckled and he pressed his forehead to Tooru’s. 

“You're the only one I’d want to commit arson with” Oikawa admitted like it was a secret. 

They rejoined and kissed. 

It was only when sirens sounded in the distance that they broke apart again, they all stopped and looked at the directions they came from. The main houses had a light on now instead of it being pitch black. 

“Who wants to bet that’s the fire department?” Oikawa looked around smugly. 

“Let’s get out of here” Iwaizumi tugged Oikawa’s waist and they looked at each other and the. Makki and Mattsun. They all nodded at each other as the sirens sounded closer and closer at the seconds passed. Renewed adrenaline kicked in with the thoughts of being caught. 

They took off toward the car. Running as fast as they could through the grassy field. Racing each other to the car, Mattsun was first and threw himself into the car and Iwaizumi followed, Makki jumped, threw the open door, and slammed it shut behind him. Oikawa jumped over the hood and slid over it till his feet hit the driver's side and turned the car on and put the car in drive as fast as he could. Taking off forward and following the trail thru until they came out towards a freeway entrance. 

They watched as three firetrucks passed them in the direction they had just come from. And laughed cause they knew they did it. They got away with committing a known felony. 

Iwaizumi and Oikawa held hands in the front seat as they headed back towards their neighborhood. Relishing in the fact that they had in fact done that and may have gotten away with committing an act of arson on Ushijima’s farm.

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo how was it? did you like it? 
> 
> I really was impressed and inspired by the creator's playlist and they have a lot more videos of different characters. 
> 
> comment what you think or talk to me on twitter @heapllieos


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